Driving can offer a kind of contemplation not terribly different then mindful meditation. The movement of the vehicle and other vehicles we share the road with require my attention in such a fashion that, now at 45, I can drive without being stressed or fully occupied mentally. This seems to allow a kind of free thinking, unencumbered.
That being said, today's revelation occurred on the drive back to Philly after a weekend away.
It occurred to me the grand picture of my life currently mirrors an important pocket of my life experience.
In recent weeks I must have mentioned this two or three times to someone.. that the PA Academy of the Fine Arts has such a great program specifically because they require every student take a broad platform of classes the first two years. It is aptly called the foundation program. The second two years you focus on your major in whatever medium that suits your personal expression.
The fantastic thing about this set up is, by its nature, it helps to remove the obstacles created by cluttered thinking and preoccupations with the many unknowns that can cripple an artist's vision and expression. The challenge with finding focus is its own task in a young artist or one who has allowed the countless distractions of life inhibit their personal path toward unique expression.
The challenge is compounded by hidden and known fears. The fear can stem from many places.. many experiences. Each individual who hopes to tap their greatest potential would need to do their homework in learning to be honest with themselves and with forging ahead, in spite of fear, that is a given. But, on a more basic level, any one who has not faced the many facets of potential for expression found in a variety of media might be crippled by the shear volume of materials with which to express himself. Having the opportunity of a structured class with the purpose of exploring the new medium is ideal. It frustrates many new students who are fired up to rush out and speak to the world their deeply personal vision. Often, those most ready to rush the purpose find their voice, in retrospect, shallow and lacking the richness that comes with experience.
Enduring those first two years with good humor and openness something different transpires. By default we find ourselves removing the clutter that would otherwise block our path if not fully undermine our journey to rich, complex and powerful personal expression.
It seems to me that my current life is enmeshed with that very same nuance of education. I have been taking on tasks that seem silly, random, unrelated.. but it is easy to see how working at a dog grooming salon is serving me and my upcoming journey in ways I had not fathomed. The same is true for the shedding of the RV and adoption of the wonderful '83 Chevy Suburban... there is within me a sort of clearing that is happening. I can feel it.. evidence of it is around me. As my mind clears, my focus, my vision, my personal voice is returning in its full strength and splendor.
It is wonderful and unexpected to think that a dog could start this process of powerful realizations. But, then again... if you have had more than one conversation with me.. you will know that is not a far stretch for someone of my ilk. It is a great comfort to me that so much clarity would fill me at this stage.. as I feel my engine revving at a good pace now.. as I get closer and closer still to my full departure.
Now I see how, once fully prepared, I will be able to fly further into this magical journey as my clutter is cleared and my full vision restored... allowing all that I have asked for to flow to me freely as it was intended... and myself, open, willing, ready, eager to receive without a single item or experience blocking the full flow of money, ideas, inspiration, pleasure, joy and deep satisfaction.
For now... I must rest.. and hope for you all a moment's rest, luxuriating in the vast, endless beauty this life holds.. in all its mysteries and opportunities to know ourselves better and to grow more fully into the best of who we are.. a part of the infinite.